Beer Makes Kris Something...Something...

I had planned to blog about something in particular today, but then I had a beer and now I've completely forgotten what it was I meant to talk about.  I don't think it was actually the beer, but I'm going to blame the beer anyway, because the beer can't defend itself.

We had the Rite of Election today, which means I got to take all of the catechumens from our group up to the cathedral to be accepted by the Bishop to enter the Church on the Easter Vigil.  The cathedral is so pretty, I always regret not living closer so that I could go more often.  I actually get to go twice this year, which is really neat!  I intend to do a blog about that one in the future, because I get to go up for a ceremony I have never been to before or heard of before yesterday.

I've been really enjoying the time that I've been finding for prayer.  Today I showed up to the church early and discovered that there was adoration going on in the morning, so I got to enjoy morning prayer in the presence of our Lord!  I was thinking about how the Tabernacle, the monstrance, the crucifix, and the picture of the Virgin Mary with baby Jesus were all tied together and it just made everything seem really amazing when all together in the same room.

At this juncture, I totally remembered what my other blog was going to be about, but I feel like I've come to far to go back now.  I'm just going to do as Angela did and leave this here:

Rite of Election

Today, my RCIA group had to go to the Bishop as the next step in the confirmation process.  Once again, I didn't know what to expect from today, but it was essentially like Mass but without the Eucharist.  The process was simple enough:  we stand to be recognized by the Bishop and then we're able to be confirmed in the church in a couple weeks.

At first, I was kind of excited, but now I can't help but find myself to be kind of nervous.  I thought it might be concern over making my first confession again (this has kind of been something I've been grappling with), but I think this is something more.  The end of my journey through RCIA (the last time I'll really have to go through some kind of confirmation class), the end of my Master's degree right around the corner from there, the end of my certification process; all of this is happening at once.  It's like, all of my plans and all of the steps that I've had for the last two years are all coming to completion now.  Every step has been maticulously planned out:  these are the classes to take, these are the times, these are the tests, these are the obligations, these are the rites to complete, etc.

I realized for the first time in two years, I have absolutely no guiding force for what's going to happen next.  This is a totally scary thing for someone like me.  I need a goal and steps that I can take to accomplish that goal.  I don't have any goals other than "Find a job" and the only steps you can take are "apply and interview".  The rest is entirely out of my control.  That's a terrifying thought.  It's not that I prefer to have my life run and not have to take responsibility.  It's just kind of frightening to go from having everything layed out and knowing what you have to do, to having absolutely no idea about what's going on.

Today signifies the first day of the culmination of all these things.  It'll be worse in four or five weeks, when Lent, RCIA, and the last of my classes are over and all I have left is my student teaching.  I don't think I'm ready for all this "adult stuff".